For one glorious summer (2002? I think?) I ran Rappan Athuk: the Dungeon of Graves for a bunch of my gaming buddies up in Oakland. I had moved down to Los Angeles and it was sort of a "last gasp", and I invited everyone to come to the table with their most game-breaking character concepts - at least three of them - to run them through the grist of what is arguably the world's deadliest dungeon.

I was going through some gaming stuff and came across the back of the module where I had written down all the glorious deaths that had occurred, and in the interests of archiving and entertaining, I now present them to you, with a slight warning of minor spoilers:

• Gorgak, a half-orc barbarian - killed by a mimic while sitting on a toilet.
• Illya Singh, a half-orc cleric of Nerull - killed by Turd Ferguson when he was drunk on dwarven wine.
• Turd Ferguson, an octogenarian elven mage (or the elven equivalent) - Squashed by an ogre named Ambro.
• Brooshlink Doober, a gnomish barbarian king - sliced in twain by Saracek the death knight whilst trying to retrieve his crown.
• Finron Galthis, an elven conjurer and grandson of Turd Ferguson - ripped and rended and chewed apart by a large troll.
• Bigby the ex-mage, trapped in a spell as a flaming axe-wielding barbian - Got his brain eaten by an illithid in Me'nak's tomb.
• Minister Killjoy, high priest (and halfling buggerer) of Wee-Jas - rended to pieces by a river troll.
• Bloop, a beer mephit familiar - disintegrated by a well-placed eye-ray from Gundar the Beholder.
• Slough of the Despond, a Hextorian pain-master - Failed a fort-save and died from a banshee's scream.
• Skaggy Rumples, fervent servant and disturbingly happy disciple of his own berserking longsword (called Dr. Theopolis) - same as above.
• Oakwood, a surprisingly standard halfling rogue/assassin - Ate the mushroom of youth and is now -8 years old.
• Micah, some sort of dwarven earth half-elemental rock thing - killed by a banshee, then brought back to undeath by a ring of wishes.
• Durgiss the Grim, a 10th level fighter/weapon master - cohort of the Pig Marm, killed by Geelzabigth the Glabrezu in the lower temple of Orcus.
• Onyx, the dwarven earth half-elemental rock thing version 2.0 - Killed by fellow party member Blacktooth while being dominated by Mhao the vampire.

Aaaaahhh... memories.